Born 5th March 2006 Died 26th July 2006
I stand here as one of many in the extended circle of family who have been touched by this little boy. So on behalf of all the grand parents, great grand parents and aunts and uncles, I say “Thank you” to all who have traveled this journey with us and held us when it hurt. I present this small tribute on behalf of all of them.
As a young father I thought only in terms of “my children”, but now I understand much better the notion of a baby joining the family, which is a much bigger circle that extends out across two joined families to the third and fourth generation.
They say that grand parenting is easier because you have the hugs without the dramas. This has not been our experience. I would suggest that grand parenting is a time when you do less but love more, because life’s journey has taught us the joy of a little child and the potential that lies within. When Kyla, Jack and Josh were born, I so looked forward to traveling the rest of my life with them, and telling them the stories of life.
Instead, I have a short opportunity to tell the story of my little grandson, Joshua.
His total life spanned from early March 2006 to the end of July 2006; approximately 21 weeks. The last 2 months were spent in Westmead Children’s Hospital, Sydney in the Intensive Care ward on breathing life support. You would not consider this was enough time for his life to count for anything and yet, I declare, that this little boy is known all over Australia.
I am reminded of the words of Francis Assi who said “Preach the gospel every where you go, and if necessary use words.” Little Josh never spoke a word in his short life. In the last month he had just learnt to smile, but God gifted him with two beautiful eyes. With no other movement in his body other than a small squeeze of his hand, he would engage with anyone who sat with him. One of the most beautiful photos we have of Josh is a most un-natural one. He is strapped in to his life support with equipment all over him, but shining through it all is his intense, loving gaze with his eyes talking and connecting.
This photo captured the hearts of all who saw it. It is said that the eyes are the mirror of the soul, and without a doubt he reflected love back to everyone.
What did I observe during my time with him?
He engaged with everyone who sat with him. He accepted the circumstances of his life with little complaint. He cuddled into the arms of anyone who held him. Shona, Terry, Wendy, Ruthie and the Grandmas shared in this delight. Rachel spoke to him of her time in his situation. Grandmas soothed him to sleep. Songs of Praise played in his room and many a nurse fell in love with this little boy. I spent many a long night with him, holding his hand and just being there when he was disturbed. He did not know the difference between day and night. Each 2 hrs his comfy situation was disturbed by the need to roll him over to a new position. This caused him great distress, but with a gentle touch and a loving word, he would refocus and be at peace again. He made no demands on anyone, but beamed back love and, in his last few weeks, beautiful smiles, to those who sat with him.
His departure from this life was on the same day that my twin daughters, Ruth and Rachel were born 22 years earlier. It is now a special day in our family. It was the day that Rachel began her fight for life and it is the day that little Josh lost his fight for life.
Many have expressed their sympathies to the family in many ways but I close with an anonymous poem that came across my desk. It must have been written by someone close because it expresses all the thoughts that the team who came down to Westmead would have shared as we traveled this short journey with each other.
Joshua
A precious gift sent by God
To change things in our lives
A little baby boy called Josh
A gentle sweet delight
Lent to us for a short time
To teach us all good things
How to pray and yearn and want
To feel joy and love and pain
Within those eyes wisdom revealed
What did Joshua really know
A child so small could teach so much
To many old and young
Rest assured God was in control
He knew the time was right
And as Joshua took that last little breath
God enfolded him in his arms
No longer does he need our prayers
He’s right where he belongs
He’s home in heaven with his Dad
All perfect happy and loved
Good bye Joshie – we all loved you dearly.
We will see you again one day.
